The Perfect Woman - Part Two - Shoulds

This picture is from the British Feminist Mental Health Blog Crazy Like Us?

I'm still reading Stronger Than You Think

One of the challenges in the book is to examine the things that we women tell ourselves. I started by making a list of "should"s that I tell myself often, some include:

• I should always look cute, but professional, attractive but not slutty, trendy but not trashy
• I shouldn't care about how I look, not be superficial
• I should eat wholesome, homemade, healthy, carefully prepared organic food.
• I should take less time cooking and more time doing homework, work, and chores.
• I should give 110% of myself to my job
• I should give 110% of myself to my studies
• I should give 110% of myself to my relationship, family and friends
• I should lead a perfectly balanced life, and remember to take a weekly sabbath, and quarterly vacation, get 8 hours of sleep every night and an hour of physical activity every day.
• I should speak my mind assertively
• I should question the things that are coming out of my mouth.

Do you see the problem? You can't both strive to look cute, professional, attractive, and trendy, while simultaneously not caring what you look like.

You can't give 330% of yourself, neither can you give even 100% of yourself to any activity.

I want to be conformed more and more to the image of Christ. I want know more deeply that it is His love that defines me, not how well I live up to my list of "shoulds." I don't want to want to be perfect. I want to want to be His.